Jason Pt. 2
Jason: Hey, Im glad you called I have the funniest story to tell you!
Me: Here we go.
Jason: So you know how my mom runs that crazy Tori Amos fan site?
Me: What? No, I didnt know that. Jesus, Jason what the hell is wrong with her?
Jason: I dont know but anyway listen to this, about a month ago she met some twenty year old girl on that site and they really hit it off.
Me: Oh God, if you tell me your mom dyked out with someone thirty years younger than her I am so hanging up.
Jason: C’mon now, you know my mom is strictly dickly it runs in the family, no. Anyway she meets this chick from Ohio on her fan page and invites this girl and her boyfriend to come and visit her in Florida for a week.
Me: God, this is creepy.
Jason: Oh thats not even the crazy part, so I have no clue about any of this until I get a knock on my door at 2 am. My mother and this bitch from the internet are standing in the hallway with a bag of weed and a water bong.
Me: Holy Shit! what did you do?
Jason: What do you think I did? I grabbed the bag of weed and headed for the balcony!
Me: Oh my God! Have you ever smoked with your mom before?
Jason: A few times…but the crazy thing is my roomate woke up to go take a piss and the next day he was all like “Who were those people smoking weed on the balcony?” and I was like “dude, that was my mom”.
Me: Jason, that is so strange.
Jason: I know right, I dont know whether to be creeped out or proud. Anyway, I have something weird to tell you.
Me: Weirder than a 50 year old woman running a fan site, soliciting people off of it for company, and then showing up with said company at her sons rental apartment to get high?
Jason: Yes.
Me: Oh great, whats up?
Jason: Ok, well dont freak out, everything is fine now but….I sort of had cancer.
Me: What?
Jason: Yeah
Me: Wait a minute….what?
Jason: It’s nothing really a little melanoma, but I had the surgery last week and they got it all.
Me: I talked to you last week why didnt you tell me?
Jason: It seems like nothing is ever real until I tell it to you, this was something I didnt want to be real so I just played it off.
Me: Are you ok?
Jason: yeah, Im in a little bit of pain because they had to remove the lymph node in my groin but Im going to be fine.
Me: Jesus……
August 1, 2008 at 6:05 pm
What’s a “water bong?”
August 2, 2008 at 8:40 pm
Ok, here goes…..
Weed- a slang term for Marijuana.
Marijuana-an illegal psyhotropic substance.
Bong aka Water bong- A smoking device used to smoke weed aka Mariuana.
August 9, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Thanks for setting me straight on that. I thought it had something to do with having sex in a jacuzzi.
September 18, 2008 at 7:22 am
That story is just awesome!
This is my first visit to your blog but I will be back. Hopefully you will post more because we are all waiting? It’s been, like, more than a month.
Underblawger, how can you be a lawyer and not know what a water bong is?
September 20, 2008 at 9:05 am
Thanks for the comment Stoogepie, I have a few blogs that I need to clean up and will be posting before the end of the weekend, Thanks again!